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If you want to sing, be sure to sign up early. If the bar has arcade games, challenge her to a game. Blink and a clique of Snapchatting Beckys becomes a squad of gaymer bros too beers. Sounds like you're putting together a nice system there. The number of people you're out with is also a factor. It's Saturday night and you want to meet someone new.
Below, we bring you a roundup of spots around town where you're most likely to get lucky almost any night of the week depending, of course, on your standards and level of intoxication at the time. The 500 Club photo: Erik Wilson The 500 Club Part sports bar, part neighborhood watering hole, part Mission dive, the 500 Club is an unrivaled spot for any type of making out. Celebrate your connection with a first kiss while sitting at one of the booths and nursing a few PBRs. Get your grope on in the bathroom line. Whatever kind of improper behavior you care to do, you can do it at the 500 Club. Katie Sweeney 500 Guerrero Street at 17th Street Photo: Yelp It's been long heralded as one of the spots to see and be seen at happy hour, assuming you're a dress-up-for-work type and tend to gravitate toward bougier kinds of cocktails establishments. The Embarcadero-adjacent patio at Americano is especially hopping in nice weather, pretty much every night after work, and this hotel bar offers plenty of space to mingle for the late-20s to late-30s set, especially for finance bros and well dressed women who work in marketing and PR. Jay Barmann Hotel Vitale, 8 Mission Street at the Embarcadero Photo: Facebook You know what list Badlands will never get on? Best Bars in San Francisco. Or even Best Gay Bars in San Francisco. But if you're in the market for a certain kind of drunken hookup, especially with a tourist in town from Europe on a weeknight, this is going to be your best bet because gay tourists do not venture outside the Castro, and this is where they always, always end up. Just be sure to explain to them how to get back to their hotel from your apartment once the deed is done. Jay Barmann 4121 18th Street between Castro and Collingwood Photo: Facebook Quite possibly the frattiest of all the Marina bars is Bar None. However, there is a time and a place for each and every long-standing San Francisco institution and Bar None, like your favorite frat house in college, shines for its late night make-out scene. Katie Sweeney 1980 Union Street at Buchanan Tianyu L. Buckshot is a bar unafraid to be itself. You know about the implications and possible outcomes of dancing. Also note that Buckshot, per its name, has put a lot of emphasis on taxidermy, which could probably be seen as sexy in a hunting lodge by the fire on a rug sort of way. Nineties throwback bar Double Dutch is dark and dirty. Be warned, however, the bouncers run a tight ship and anyone who is too drunk and caught making out with multiple randoms could be subject to ejection from the bar. I may or may not be speaking from experience. Nestled into one of the low tables with a potent nightcap for liquid courage, you'll want to go in for that memorable first kiss. Your night probably started with civilized drinks somewhere like Bar Agricole, then turned a little crazier with Jameson shots at Wish, then someone, that one friend who always makes poor decisions maybe it was you?! Katie Sweeney 1535 Folsom Street near 11th Photo: Waterbeds, stripper poles, and wallpaper that consists of pinups of naked women from the 70's screams make-out spot, am I right? If you've been eying that friend of a friend for some time now, go to Kozy Kar with your crew. Secure the prime waterbed truck in the back, and then, after you've had a few PBRs and shots of Fireball, roll over near your crush and make your move. Naked make-out at their place afterwards, optional! Katie Sweeney 1548 Polk Street at Sacramento Photo via. The name says it all, of course. This Mission District bar practically begs you to take part in the eponymous activity, and of live music and frequent Cumbia DJ's is sure to get you and every attractive stranger in the place on the dancefloor. Particularly of note is the weekly Slow Jams show hosted every Tuesday by San Francisco treasure DJ Primo. The show is free, and the deep 60's soul sets the perfect mood to find a like-minded hip shaker. Oh, and as it's not too loud in there, you should be able to hear what if anything your potential one-night stand has to say before you walk out into the night, dripping with sweat, to hail a cab to whichever apartment happens to be closer. On Friday and Saturday nights, the dancefloor is packed with people in various stages of drunkenness getting their groove on. And while you're at it, why not let him grab your ass while you're doing it? Katie Sweeney 1233 Polk Street between Bush and Sutter Mauna Loa The Marina dive with the Hawaiian theme has a few things going for it. It's something of a departure from the nearby frat row. There's a nice front area for congregating and mingling, and if the odds aren't in your favor, the back is for consolation games of pool and Big Buck Hunter. The place looks old because it is: The bar has stood there since 1955. The liquid courage at Northstar is cheap and the crowd is friendly. Photo: As far as the gay scene is concerned, I'm sad to say there aren't a lot of down-and-dirty bars left in this town where it's still socially acceptable to make out with strangers and maybe shove a hand down their pants. But this, however, is something that happens pretty much nightly at The Powerhouse, either on the back dancefloor, in the way-back smoking patio, or right up against the bar under the nose of a go-go boy, beneath some porn playing on a screen in the ceiling. Sure you could find a drunk twink trying to make out with you any night of the week at Toad Hall in the Castro, and who knows what'll happen at any of the various party nights at Oasis or The Eagle. But for my money, if you're looking for the sluttiest gay scene in town that isn't a full-on sex party, it's The Powerhouse you're after and you don't want to bring your girlfriends in particular, the Thursday Bulge party, and the monthly Beatpig, on third Saturdays. Jay Barmann 1347 Folsom Street near 10th Divey, small, casual R Bar ranks as a top spot for you and your friend group to mingle with others and maybe swap squad members for the night. The place has stood its ground off the Polk Street strip since 1940, but the clientele doesn't appear to age at all, with post-college crowds still pouring in for Fernet shots their specialty with a ginger beer back. You might need a few of those to fully appreciate the bizarre wall art. It's been around about a decade now and thus is an established haunt, but tourists hiking up from Union Square mix their way in as well. Be warned that on weekends you're going to have to fight your way to get to the bar. Jay Barmann 688 Geary Street at Leavenworth.
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